The day you and your partner decide to agree to undergo a committed relationship must be an important moment that pushes you to the shadows of the days you want to fulfill by doing fun things with your partner, right? At this stage, you and your partner will try to understand each other’s needs. Therefore, this stage is also a good time to discuss various aspects of life that you will face going forward together, Ladies.
Reporting from SheKnows , mental health advisor, April Kirkwood, states, research shows that any relationship that has been running for more than three months is considered a serious relationship. In this new commitment, for him is a good time to discuss sensitive topics that will be faced together. Because, at this point, both are still in a calm condition, and can communicate with love and mutual respect.
“If the agreement does not occur at this initial stage, then, it will not happen in the future,” said Kirkwood. He added, this could reduce the potential for a dispute between the two related to these sensitive topics. For starters, here are some topics that need to be discussed with your partner before you finally decide to commit to him more deeply, Ladies, in other words marry him.
Prioritize Dating Together
Dating or spending time and having fun together is indeed important to create and maintain bonds together with your partner. The reason is, through this activity, Clinical Psychologist, Dara Bushman, said, emotions and thoughts will be pushed to things that are fun so as to create memories that will strengthen bonds between humans. According to him, this needs to be prioritized, planned, and even scheduled together. “If you cannot plan, prioritize, and schedule it from before marriage, then, don’t think it will happen later,” he said.
The Way Each Gives and Receives Affection
You and your partner may not like the same way or things in giving and receiving love from loved ones. Therefore, it is important to discuss it together. “Yes, you can continue to learn about each other, however, don’t expect it to happen without communication,” Bushman said. At the same time, he also recommends making physical contact with a partner, such as hugging, kissing, or holding hands. “You won’t be able to bond if you don’t make physical contact. You have to touch it like your life depends on it, “he explained.
How to Deal with Problems
Conflict resolution is not easy. However, this can be made easier if you and your partner know how to deal with each other’s emotions. Communicating things that make each other angry and how to deal with them when they are emotional, is a good step to avoid the adverse effects of conflict that can occur. “Make an agreement that if one of you is very hurt, then, the others will relent and stop the fight,” he said.
When you step into a relationship with commitment, financial related topics cannot be avoided. The reason is, this will greatly affect your life together in the future if you decide to live a deep commitment. The way to one another in managing finances, whether there is income, expenses, or even debt, needs to be discussed in depth.
The Role of Religion
Even though you have the same religion, it is possible that the way you apply it in life can be different. In the process, not infrequently, religion can be the main trigger for the destruction of the commitment of the relationship that is built, both to new and old couples.
To prevent this from happening, Family and Relationship Psychotherapist, Beverly Hills, California, Dr. Fran Walfish, advises couples to communicate about the way and what each view and want to apply to life together in the future and now. Especially if you are a couple of different religions, then, there is also a need to talk about religion that will be applied to children in the future.
If you undergo a relationship that aims at deep commitments such as marriage, then, the conversation related to wanting and not wanting to have children becomes very vital. Even though it seems too fast, this conversation can be a major determinant of the continuity of your relationship with him. In this case, Walfish states that children can be the main cause of the breakdown of a relationship, even though the relationship has been going on for a long time. Therefore, to avoid future destruction, he suggested to talk about it as soon as possible.